May 26th 2020

My son is trying to kill me…….. somewhere in the recess of his mind he thinks that his older mother can keep up with a D1 athletes workout regimen, where did I go wrong?  He forced me to workout with him, which means I nearly died. 85 degree heat with 63 percent humidity only cemented the fact that he was trying to kill me. He made me run. That’s right R-U-N. I only run if something or someone is chasing me. I am not a pleasure runner, there is nothing about those two words together that make sense to me. When I hear that someone loves running and can’t imagine a day without it, I look at them as though they just spoke greek and expect me to lapse into the language. I don’t get it. I have never had the supposed “runners high” that long time runners get, I was once told “just wait sometimes it takes awhile, then you get a runners high and you can’t stop”. Look, if I didn’t get it after six years of running in the military, it ain’t happening.  I am beginning to believe that this supposed runners high doesn’t actually exist but is just hype that runners came up with to try and get the rest of us to suffer with them; you’re not fooling me, I am on to your scheme.  But I digress… basically my son made me run and I spent fifteen minutes after we were done, grilling him about why he is trying to kill me, To be completely honest the grilling session lasted longer than fifteen minutes because I was trying to breath in between accusations I was throwing at him. His only reply was “I am actually trying to make you live longer, because I love you”…yeah right, like that’s a viable reason.

Ended my day sending a text message worrying about feeling left out in a group of friends I have, to the wrong person. Before you ask, yes, I sent the text message to a friend in the group I was worrying about. Sigh. The beauty of this error is that my friend responded in the way that only she can. Her text read ” stop worrying so much! Don’t worry be happy!” As an expert level worrier, this surprisingly made me laugh out loud (lol for you millennials out there) and actually stop worrying. About that particular falsely made up issue anyway. On to the next….. These imagined issues don’t worry about themselves, people.

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